Sunday, August 07, 2005

Breast not best, says EU

Iran is planning to launch a wave of suicide bombings against Western targets. But don't worry, the EU will protect us against washing instructions and the sun's harmful rays:


Beer drinkers in Germany are frothing at the mouth over EU plans to make Bavarian barmaids cover up. The aim of the proposed EU directive is to protect them from the sun's harmful rays. But the so-called "tan ban" has been condemned as absurd by breweries, politicians - and the barmaids. Bavarian barmaids typically wear a a costume known as a dirndl - a dress and apron with a tight, low-cut top enhanced by a short white blouse. Under the EU's Optical Radiation Directive, employers must ensure staff who work outdoors cover up against the risk of sunburn. Bavarian bar keepers have been told the dirndl will have to be replaced as it does not provide adequate protection. They face heavy fines if they fail to comply with the new legislation, which goes before MEPs next month.


At August 07, 2005 9:15 PM, Blogger Zach said...

I can't help but think that the EU is a mutant comedy troupe like Saturday Night Life, which in some kind of reverse The Mouse that Roared way, accidentally achieved political power and forgot to tell anyone.

At August 07, 2005 11:06 PM, Blogger bosaxi said...

The EU wouldn't bring this up if it weren't a problem. I think the most obvious solution would be to use sunblock. And if sunblock is not an option, for whatever reason, a bar-maid should not be forced to wear an outfit that is bad for her health.

Too much sun IS dangerous and should be taken seriously. And I bet it is especially hard on the soft skin of a breast.

At August 07, 2005 11:07 PM, Blogger nouille said...


Can't people decide for themselves?

At August 07, 2005 11:10 PM, Blogger nouille said...

bosaxi, smoking is dangerous too, and a problem in the E.U.

At August 07, 2005 11:39 PM, Blogger erp said...

Now something will get the attention of the European male.

At August 07, 2005 11:40 PM, Blogger PD111 said...

The EU! What next? Cover up on the beaches. I give up.


At August 07, 2005 11:52 PM, Blogger sissyblue said...

Ya, drinking is dangerous too, what about liver disease? Maybe the EU will eventually require all humans go around in Bubble Boy suits. Liberals are hysterical!

At August 08, 2005 12:07 AM, Blogger Rolf said...

This is the most stupid idea I've heard.

At August 08, 2005 12:39 AM, Blogger bosaxi said...

EU does not plan to regulate dirndls

UPI - Tuesday, August 02, 2005

Date: Tuesday, August 02, 2005 10:11:15 PM EST

MUNICH, Germany, Aug. 2 (UPI) -- Bavarians have been assured that proposed European rules protecting outdoor workers from sun will not prevent beer-garden waitresses from wearing dirndls.

Dirndls, traditional in southern Germany, are known for their low necklines.

Frank-Ulrich John, a spokesman for a Bavarian innkeeper's association, told Deutsche Welle that the dirndl "is an integral part of Bavarian culture and joy of living."

"I have spoken with many servers, and I have never heard that a sunburn in the cleavage area has been a problem," John said.

While rumors swept the area that the European Union planned to ban dirndls, officials finally said that working in a beer garden is not considered a high-risk occupation -- at least for sun exposure.


At August 08, 2005 9:49 AM, Blogger Gavriel said...

Perhaps they should dress them like Iranian barmaids, if there were such a thing. No risk of sunburn there, and might buy the EU a few more months of exemption from Islamic wrath.

At August 09, 2005 5:01 AM, Blogger Mike V. said...

The only boobs the EU bureaucrats should be worrying about are themselves.

At August 15, 2005 4:27 AM, Blogger Bruce said...

Dammit, what we really need are laws protecting us from the dangers of dihydrogen oxide! It causes numerous fatalities every year, and is disturbingly easy to obtain. Where is the EU task force for that? Don't they care?


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